A LOOOOOOONG overdue update

Family pic taken for the church directory. Ben and Mike are in Ethan's lap, Delia with me.


Ben was sooooo tired, he fell asleep in the bumbo!


Ben, Delia and Mike playing with their overhead gym.


Delia, Mike and Ben in their bumbos.


Ben, Mike and Delia


So it's true, life as a full time working mom and mom of triplets is exactly as busy and crazy as you'd imagine it is. And as you can see, I've not had much time or made it a priority to keep the blog updated. But I am going to make my best effort to get back to it now. Not only for all those who hung with me through the bedrest and 10 weeks in the NICU, but for myself, because as I look back at those first months, the blog is my only source of memories. And they are just way too cute now and do too many cute things, I've got to have some place to keep track of them!

Let's see, what has happened since November 1? A lot! I'll break it down by category:

HEALTH We've had a few bumps but at the moment are all doing great. Poor Ben has been hit hard. He spent five days in the hospital just before Thanksgiving due to a skin infection. He needed surgery to drain an abscess, and then IV antibiotics to get rid of the leftovers, but he has recovered nicely. There is about an inch long scar on his collar bone area, but we're working with over the counter scar cream to get rid of it. Or we can make up a fun story about what happened when he gets older, whatever.

Ben also had a bout of pneumonia and spent four days in the hospital at New Year's. Yes, Ethan was in the ER with him on New Year's Eve. I knew we wouldn't have a "fun" evening like we have in the past, but I hadn't expected that we would be in separate places! Such is life.

Other than that, no serious issues. Mike and Delia each had one ear infection; Delia and Ben had croup. Everyone has had fevers, coughs and runny noses. We expected that, between winter, crummy immune systems, and daycare. I didn't think it would be this bad but we are surviving. I joked that my new year's resolution was go to 7 days without seeing the pediatrician; we haven't made it yet. As a matter of fact, I'm almost positive that we haven't gone 7 days since we left the hospital October 10 without being in for some kind of shots, well visit or sick visit. Good thing I love our doctor!

DEVELOPMENT They are growing like weeds and learning all kinds of new things. Everyone has good head control and they enjoy sitting in their bumbos, although they can't sit unassisted yet. Delia and Ben have become big thumb suckers, but Mikey never really picked it up. He actually sucks on his upper lip which looks very strange, but hey, whatever works. They are starting to babble and coo, and Mikey squeals like a hyena. It is hysterical when they try to carry on a conversation with you, I can tell by the inflection of their sounds that they have a message they are trying to convey, but it comes out as ah-goo, aggen-gaggen, or gee. Mikey has rolled over belly to back, and Delia can go from her back to her left side. Mikey raises his head very well while on his tummy. Everyone is doing well reaching for toys and grasping things you put in their hands.

We had a visit with the developmental team at St. Francis last week and everyone is progressing right on schedule for their adjusted age, good news that put my mind at ease. They gave us suggestions on ways to play and exercises to help ensure everyone gains head strength, learns to roll over and sit up unassisted, and doesn't develop a preference for one side yet. Of course everyone ends up right or left handed, but at this age it is too soon for that to be determined, and for balance and such it is important that they don't work one side more than the other. They can also develop tight muscles if they are always looking one way versus the other, or develop flat spots on their heads.....Mikey actually has one on his right side that may require a head shaping helmet. That was the only "bad" news we got from the appointment. We see the pediatrician for six month shots on Friday, and she'll weigh in on whether we should visit with a specialist in STL or give it more time. It's not causing him development issues right now, but in some cases if left untreated it could lead to them. And of course I don't want him to be teased for having a lopsided head his whole life. We'll see what happens. I wish he was absolutely perfect, but at least this is a relatively common problem, with a safe, reliable treatment. Can't complain about that.

SLEEPING AND EATING Sleeping is excellent. Bedtime is usually around 8 or 9, and they usually sleep through til 4 or 5AM. Most nights somebody wakes up and needs to be held or sometimes fed, but most nights it only happens once, and they take turns. Very odd to me that it isn't consistently one or the other, but hopefully that means they are getting better at self soothing and falling asleep on their own. Everyone sleeps in their cribs regularly, which means I get to sleep in my big girl bed regularly too! They nap for a couple hours between the time Ethan feeds them in the AM and the time they go to daycare, then nap twice at daycare.

Breastfeeding is over. I made it just shy of four months before I threw in the towel. When Ben came home from the hospital after the skin infection, I was keeping him home with me while I attempted to work (just for one week), taking the other two to daycare, and trying to pump all at the same time and it was becoming a huge stress. They were starting to sleep more but I still wasn't, and they were only getting about 30% breastmilk anyway because I couldn't keep the volume up, so I rationalized that I should be able to multiple my time by 3, which translated into close to a year of breastfeeding, and I quit. I wish I could have made more and gone longer, but I did what I could, and I hope I did more than most. I do not regret quitting, returning that rented breast pump was a happy happy day!

Now we are on 100% formula, a special brand for preemies. We go through a can a day, thank goodness CGAM, Grandma Maggie and great grandma McDonough are keeping me stocked! Bottle making and cleaning is like running a small factory. We've developed processes to make things run more smoothly, and we live and die by our rules. It still takes a LOT of time each day. We are at 5-6 bottles per day per kid. The boys are taking 5 ounces per feed, Delia is at 4 ounces. Since we watch volumes very closely, we premake all the bottles and take them to daycare so they can easily pull them out and go.

Bottle washing tends to happen two or three times a day. Ethan is the bottle washer, I agreed to be the primary bath giver because he didn't want to, and he took bottle duty. Using Dr. Brown bottles makes things more complicated because there are two extra pieces per bottle to be washed. So for each feeding there is a bottle, nipple, collar, reservoir, and vent insert. Bottles from daycare have a disk (to prevent leaks if they tip over before being used) and a lid. Times three. Times 5-6. Yikes. And not only do we wash, we also use a microwave steam sterilizer to be sure we kill all the germs. We have two steamers, and three drying racks. Bottles have taken over our entire counter, but at least we have enough room to have the pieces sorted out.

I am the bottle maker, unless it is a night when we have a helper. We make an entire day's worth of bottles at once, usually mixing two batches of formula because I don't have a pitcher big enough to hold it all at once. It's down to a science now, and I've found that Ethan and I both tend to focus on these teeny tiny details quite a bit, I think because it's one of the few things we can still control.

We can't control the chaos our living room has become. Can't help that it looks like a toy store. Can't help that there are two swings, two bouncers, three boppies, three bumbos, and an overhead play gym filling the entire floor. And a playpen. Three carseats. A changing table and diaper genie. Cases of formula. Laundry hamper. And that's just in the kitchen/living room area. It is everywhere, on every inch of our house. And it's only going to get worse the bigger they become.

DAYCARE I love our daycare, and I love working. It probably makes me a freak, but I just cannot fathom staying home with them all day. I love them so, so much, but if I had to be alone all day with the three of them, I might throw them out the window. It is exhausting. So work is a pleasant break from crying, and a chance to feel useful to someone who doesn't sit in their own poo all the time. Plus the staff at daycare are amazing, the kids love them and I can trust them. When someone is sick, they worry and ask how they are. When we went for the developmental evaluation, they asked how they could help, and what sorts of play they should build into the lesson plan. I could not ask for more caring people and I am extremely happy that I was able to find them!

I think that covers the hilights of the past three months. I'll try to write more if I remember anything else, otherwise I'll make a better effort to keep current. But as you can hopefully tell from my descriptions above, every second of the day is busy so free time is hard to find!

Oh yeah, the ever exciting weight updates. Keep in mind we were six months on Sunday:
Ben 15 lb 8 oz
Delia 12 lb 8 oz
Mike 14 lb 10 oz

Prematurity Awareness Day

I hope to add another post later today, but I want to be sure I manage to at least get something up in support of prematurity awareness day. One thing I hope to accomplish with this blog is to educate people about prematurity and some of the consequences that premature babies deal with the first years of their life. It is truly a miracle that so many premature babies are able to live normal lives after fighting to hard just to survive their first days.

The most important thing I've learned about premature babies is that coming home from the hospital is not the end of being careful. They have up to three years to catch up on all their developmental goals, including fully developing their immune system. When you see any baby, premature or not, remember that they are fragile and wash your hands before touching them! It amazes me how many people think it is OK to come up and touch the kids when we are at the doctor's office. I probably deal with it more than the average mom because we are quite a sight but it's true for everyone.

Thanks everybody!

Back to reality

Little miss thing in her Halloween outfit


Papa Ben holding Mikey


Gran holding Ben


Three peas in a pod


Ben, Delia and Mikey with the presents sent by Irish cousins


The family dressed up for Halloween - no comments on the size of my rear!


Happy Halloween! Mikey and Ben as peas, Delia as a little flower


Ben is so cute when he is mad!


More cute pea pods


Delia loves her daddy :)

Wow, it's been a long time since I updated this blog. Let's see, what's happened since I last wrote....lots and lots more of the same. Overall everyone is doing great, no real problems to speak of. We just don't have this sleeping thing down yet.

If we have pacifiers we can sleep just fine, but if it falls out of our mouth, heaven help us. We might as well start pulling out toenails with a pliers. What's so great about the darn things? I've tried them several times, and they don't seem that great to me. I guess I'd feel differently if I was a baby though.

We had several visitors in the past weeks, some friends from work in STL and CGAM, and of course Grandma Maggie. Our helpers have been fantastic too, they take care of bottle washing, bottle prep for the night and daycare, and laundry, plus help with a feed and some cuddling. We're very lucky to have found the folks we did.

Everyone's personality is developing more and more each day. Benjamin has become our chunky monkey, hubba bubba, growing boy. As of last Friday he was 9 lb 13 oz, almost ten pounds! He's just big all over, although he inherited stubby legs from his dad because all his pants are too long. When it's time to eat, boy he'll let you know. And if he gets hungry he'll let you know that too. I think he may be having some gas issues, because sometimes we try to give him a little extra and it doesn't really seem to make a difference, but he doesn't always need to make extra burps either. Our NICU nurse friends are coming to visit this week, so maybe they'll be able to help us solve the mystery.

Delia continues to be a little diva. Her cry gets more shrill and high pitched each and every day, and she is learning how to turn it off and on faster too. It's almost like there is a little button on her back, that when she lays down it gets pressed in and makes her scream. As soon as you pick her up and the button pops back out, instant silence. She has added tears for some extra flair too, which tugged at my heartstrings the first few times but now I'm not so sure it isn't just a ploy for more attention. She's had to cry a few times when I was elbow deep in poo, or trying to take a shower or whatnot, and she does eventually quit, but I'm afraid of doing permanent damage so I continue to indulge her.

As if she knows her powers are starting to fade, she has become quite the little cuddle bug. She loves to bury her face in our necks, and grab at us with her tiny little hands. It really is quite sweet and I"ve decided that she really does love us, that this part isn't just a trick to control us.

Michael is....well, he's Michael. The happiest damn kid you ever saw one minute, hysterical the next. And he is the king of facial expressions. Happy means eyes wide open, almost popping out of his head, and a beautiful smile. Sad means lower lip pouted out, face scrunched, tears a-flowin'. He is truly pitiful. But it's hard to get mad at him because he is so damn cute. When he's fighting sleep he makes the funniest faces too, his mouth kind of hangs open and his eyes flutter like he's lifting the weight of the world every time his eyelids fly open. WHen he gets mad, he accidentally blows raspberries and scares himself.

We had a terrific photo session a couple weekends ago with Aunt Shannon, owner of Phases Photography. After four hours of picture taking, we came out with some really great nakey pictures, as well as a cute family photo. I'll post some when they are available.

Today was my first day back at work since June 22. Boy did it feel good to be back. Not only to have adult interaction, but also because of the amazing people I work with. Nobody wanted to throw projects at me, nobody made comments about how I was late or how long I was off. Everyone was genuinely glad to have me back. It is so rare to find a group that truly appreciates your contributions and values your friendship. I'm so glad that my job is so awesome, it made leaving the kids at daycare that much easier.

Four hours later and I still haven't finished typing this! But my eyelids are getting heavy so there Will be more to come soon.

Weight update - as of Friday Oct 29
Ben 9 lb 13 oz
Michael 9 lb 0 oz
Delia 8 lb 10 oz

My favorite things

We had a really good night last night, everyone slept when they were supposed to and there was minimal fussing, so I'm cautiously optimistic that we may have turned a corner. Or at least we'll start to have good nights more than once a week!

I was thinking the other day about all the cute things each baby does that I want to remember, so I figured I better make a list. Having babies has made me lose my mind in more ways than one, so I can barely remember who I've fed let alone try to remember something for more than a day! So here goes:

Ben: the pirate eye (when he squints one shut and leaves one eye open); sticky up hair all the time; wrinkled brow and confused look he gets when you ask him a question; pulling blankets or his shirt up close to his face like he's hiding when he sleeps; dark serous eyes; the teeny tiny baby sighs he makes when he's sleeping; heavy heavy eyelids that fight to stay open towards the end of a bottle.

Delia: the way she reaches out to touch Ethan's goatee in total awe; cute way she makes a perfect little O with her mouth; the way she gets so frustrated when she wants to reach out and touch something and she knocks it away instead; the way she burrows her head into your shoulder when you hold her; gummy smiles.

Michael: His most pitiful crying face; rooting everywhere, like my shoulder, Ethan's face, and other weird places; crazy eyes; sticking his tongue out like a little lizard; throwing his arms up in excitement for no reason at all; trying to claw his eyes out when he eats.

And here are some pictures of general adorableness.

Life at home

One of my helpers is here to replace dropped binkies, so I actually have a few minutes that I can update this darn thing! Hopefully. I've started to type several times and multiple babies have started screaming, so it may not work as I had hoped.

Life at home with all three is.....interesting.....to say the least. It's completely amazing to have them all here, to be able to lay them next to each other, play with them, roam about the house without having to worry about the wire from a monitor. But of course, we terribly miss all the extra hands from the hospital! Not just because they are helpers, but also because they are our friends :)

Everyone is still on a three hour feeding schedule, which is rough, but so far we are surviving. At night we do the 10PM feed together, then I do 1AM and Ethan does 4AM. Ideally we each have a five hour chunk to sleep, if everyone is quiet. But of course they are not. The leading contenders for fuss-bucket of the year are Michael and Delia for sure, but Ben has his moments, usually when he still has a burp stuck in there.

When it's only one or the other fussing, it's manageable. I can lay in the recliner with someone on my chest and we both sleep well. But when more than one fusses, it is tough to calm everyone alone. If we had an extra set of hands 24/7 and everyone could be held all the time we'd be golden. Of course that's not an option, so we have to rotate and do the best we can to get everyone quiet and happy at the same time. Much easier said than done.

By the way, have I mentioned that I have terrible hot flashes still? I guess the breastfeeding is keeping those crazy hormones running rampant. Hot flashes SUCK. Menopause is gonna be awful. But I digress.

Friday night was by far the worst we've had so far. Everyone was fussy all night long. I didn't even attempt to close my eyes until 5AM. And as the hours tick by on the clock, I start to think about how much sleep I'm not getting, and start to panic about how tired I'll be the next day, and get more worked up, which makes the baby worked up, and the vicious cycle ends with us both in tears. Arg.

It hasn't been that bad again since, just the one person fussing at a time. But it was enough to make me decide to reach out for more help. I've already got a coworker's college aged daughter coming Monday and Tuesday nights to help out, and someone from church on Thursday nights. It looks like a neighbor is going to take Sunday nights, and our niece Wednesdays. That way we'll have someone to catch us up on dishes, laundry, de-cluttering, and to make the night time bottles, help feed, etc. A third set of hands makes a huge difference, or allows one of us to get to bed earlier.

We're working on a schedule for the kids, hoping that will help with night time sleeping. It's so hard to keep them on schedule though, because if someone is extra fussy or we have visitors or a doctor appointment or anything, we start someone late and it trickles down from there. We're still trying to stick to it as much as we can, hopefully they will grow into it.

I need to start getting up every day and practicing getting the babies in the car and out the door, but I'm too tired to right now. I go back to work November 1, so I better figure something out soon :) My one day at a time mentality is not helping my motivation. Oh well.

That's about it for now, there is much more to tell but my eyes are getting terribly heavy so I'm going to attempt to sleep.

Please continue to pray for us, we need strength and patience to make this journey successful. Thank you so so much!

Home Sweet Home

Today was the greatest day ever. We brought Delia home, and now our family is complete and together. I'm sitting right now with Michael sprawled across me, Ben in the bouncy seat and Delia in the swing. It's been insane but amazing since we got home. Everything I dreamed it would be and more.

Great Grandma McD and CGAM were our first visitors, followed shortly after by Gran and Papa Ben, and then cousins Shannon, Irelyn and Tristen. It was a madhouse as the ladies tried to help me put away junk from the hospital and clean up dishes and laundry and we tried to get all the babies taken care of. I kind of felt like I was in a tornado, but somehow I was totally calm and happy and glad to be there. There was just so much love there, support for us and elation that everyone is finally healthy enough to be home with us.

While it was joyous to leave the hospital today, it was also bittersweet to leave our second family behind. We became so very close to our nurses and doctors; we saw them more than our own family at times. They cared for our babies and for us, and it's the end of a major chapter in our lives to be leaving. I bawled like a baby when I pushed that stroller through the front doors, it was one of the most incredible feelings I've ever experienced. Somehow it was like watching them be born all over again. In a way they were reborn today, as regular old kids leaving to go home with mom and dad. So very awesome.

I'll post more pics soon and have lots of stories to tell no doubt. Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone who has supported us thus far. We couldn"t do it without your help!

The journey

I know I'm going to regret staying up to write this tomorrow, but at the moment I feel compelled to write so away I go.

I've been thinking the past couple days about how funny life is. We spend so much time and energy working towards these goals that we set, and then once we achieve them, we don't know what to do. Or at least I don't. It's always about getting to the next step - getting into college, getting that job, getting promoted. Once my life got a little bit settled down, I had no idea what to do with myself. These babies are very similar. It was such a struggle to get pregnant, then we had to stay pregnant. Then we had to get them off oxygen, out of the incubator, eating on their own, coming home.

They will be ten weeks old tomorrow, and I feel like all I've done is focus on the next step. What about everything we've done these past ten weeks? Part of me feels like I've missed it. Now granted, exhaustion is starting to set in and I am indeed losing chunks of time in the wee hours of the morning, waking up with a baby in my lap and a half eaten bottle on the table with no memory of feeding them. But I digress. If all I ever do is focus on getting to that next milestone, I'm going to miss all the amazing stops along the way. And just the getting there.

So I'm setting a new goal to enjoy each day, and not worry so much about where I'm going. I've got to have some destination in mind so I know what direction to take life, but I don't have to go full speed ahead. Maybe I could drive in the right lane for a while and enjoy the scenery. So what if the house is dirty, or I'm late to the doctor, or the laundry isn't folded. If I want to cuddle with a baby I should do it and not feel guilty.

Is there any chance that I'll be able to follow through with this new philosophy? Not sure, but I'm definitely going to try.

Now on a funny note, the mail brought me a great laugh yesterday. Jury duty notice. I'm thinking that infant triplets qualifies as an extreme physical or financial hardship. But just to be safe tomorrow I'm going to ask the doc for a get out of jury duty free card. Surely they can come up with something. In all seriousness I'm still breastfeeding and I don't know that they would stop a trial so I can go pump. I wish this would have come a year or two ago, I would be interested in being on a jury, but the timing is just all wrong. Maybe next time.